Friday, May 29, 2009

Update?

So, my laptop seems to have crashed, and I do not have enough privacy to blog, lately. 

The majority of my entries and mobile posts-or all-have been about my devotional time studying the Bible, and finding my inner-peace, again; therefore, the rest of my days, although most of them filled with rocky circumstances, have been pretty boring. I'm not here to complain or give a play-by-play of how I have been doing. I've been all over the place! However, it has been good. Sure, I may have troubles or worries-but they do not affect me as much, anymore. 

My relationships with others have either blossomed or faded-all for good reasons. I do my best by not letting myself become imprisoned again to someone, or too emotionally attached. Some say I have changed, but in a good way. Some may think me rekindling a friendship or possible relationship is stupid, but it doesn't matter. My heart is in the right place, and these people are meant to be close or detached from me. One thing I know for certain is--now is not the time for me, or a certain someone, to take the next step from our growing friendship. He and I have dated before, and feelings are mutual. Although he says he is ready, and in a lot of ways he is, I know he needs more time. 

Anyway, I changed my major for college. Ha, I haven't started college yet, and I already changed it. 
I believe I am meant to be of aid to others. One of the careers I have looked into, but thought of it as a last resort, is actually what is right for me. In addition, my heart is in it, and I do not seek self-promotion: nursing. I want to be of aid with all ages. Children, most particularly. I want to hear other's stories, share, and be there for them. 

I am in hopes of going to school this fall. My parents cannot make up their mind over moving here or staying in Texas. I know I ought to think of where I am going when my roommates leave, but I'm not so worried about it. So far, my heart is leading me to school, and I will see what happens after that. 

Sunday, May 10, 2009

When I'm in the open desert or when i hike, I make a stop at a rock & rest. I take in the beauty of the stars, valley, or sunset- and think how amazing it is.
Place me where there are trees, a lake, or an ocean, and I feel at home. Some chill comes over me, but it passes-as if the sunlight was beaming from within.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

"With God's help though it is possible to remain friends without having fear. His peace can rule both your hearts through it all." -DB
"Quiet! Be still!" ...the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?" Mark 4:39-40
"When we struggle through the crises with God all the way to the blessing, we are gloriously redefined." -"The Patriarchs," by Beth Moore
"An honest blessing.. In every struggle do not let go until the blessing comes." -"The Patriarchs," by Beth Moore.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

It is what God wanted, and it felt right.
The time we spent together felt right. It was what God wanted. He wanted us to build a foundation on friendship first. We weren't rushing things.
Giving up is not my intention. I want it resolved. I wanted to know if we should continue on the path we were on, or go in a separate direction.
Is it wrong of me to give up, when I am discouraged in a situation I have been in many times with him?
I am ready to say good bye. You need me to let go. Are you ready for farewell?